I have chosen a word–or an intention–for my year for the last seventeen years. I have come to believe that this word becomes the thread that gets woven into the tapestry of our lives. Every year I marvel at how the word shows up or how the intention asks me to be pay attention in ways that I may have otherwise missed.
Choosing a word has always been easy for me. I typically start to feel a ruminating happen around mid-December as the current year begins to close up. I start to review the experiences that I have had throughout the year, purging what no longer serves me and making space for new things that will. I carefully choose what I want to hold onto and release the rest.
It occurred to me this morning that the last three years intentions have been very active, strong, even forceful at times in their feel. The past three years I have been on a mission of incredibly hard work, proving to myself I am beyond capable, establishing myself being a successful entrepreneur, healing from horrific pain, pushing through my limits and identifying false beliefs…basic badass mentality for at least three years.
No more.
Truth is I am exhausted. I am tired of the push. Although I had the best financial year of my life, my body paid a price. The success of last year was awesome. The people I met, the lives I helped change, the excitement of building an amazing business and solid reputation was by far one of the best feelings that I have ever had. But I hurt and I am depleted.
Being a full time yoga teacher may seem glamorous but the reality is, it is incredibly challenging. The energy and intention that is required to show up and hold space for others takes a tremendous amount of presence. Add to that, a yoga teacher doesn’t exactly make a ton of money, so in order to be successful, you have to teach many classes. That pressure combined with being the sole person responsible for a disabled adult child has been an incredible load. But, I did it. I built an incredible foundation to my business and I have a solid flow of goodness.
Earlier this fall I got the news I have been part avoiding and part dreading. After fifteen years of being followed by rheumatology for chronic pain, fibromyalgia and other vague auto-immune symptoms, I received the diagnosis of lupus. It was one of many pebbles that were thrown at me over the last few years in an attempt to get my attention. This was a big pebble and it definitely got my attention.
As I entered into this year I decided no more power words for me. I am moving out of the fire-filled solar plexus energy where action and “doing” exist and I am now moving up into the heart space. It is here that the breath is spacious and full and the energy is softer. The heart space is a bridge to just pause. To just be. To breathe. And as I do this, I can feel the shift coming to a glorious softening.
I chose the word REVERENCE for 2020. Reverence to me means to regard or treat with a deep respect and honor. I want reverence to be woven into every action I take. I want to be reverent towards my body, my students, my family, my people, my neighbors, my community, my planet. I also believe that being a reverent business women means that I infuse a new energy into being an entrepreneur. It means that my business model has shifted from a dynamic that is motivated by profits that are generated by serving others, to a dynamic of serving others that is made possible by profits.
When I choose a word, I post it in as many places as I can and I choose to make it part of my everyday life. This year I even made up a blend of essential oils, flowers and crystals to wear everyday.
In my blend I have included the following:
- arborvitae (peace and grace)
- birch (feeling supported)
- black pepper (authentic)
- cardamom (respect)
- cassia (feeling valued)
- copaiba (inner guidance and integrity)
- douglas fir (respect and wisdom)
- frankincense (truth and discernment)
- hinoki (feeling balanced)
- patchouli (body connection)
- magnolia (compassion)
- lime (gratitude)
- pink pepper (compassion)
- roman chamomile (guided)
- rose (loving kindness)
- spikenard (grateful)
- vetiver (presence)
- Rose flower buds (love, respect, devotion)
- rose quartz (love and compassion, heart chakra)
I loaded all of these into a gloriously large 30ml roller bottle. My favorite 30ml bottles are here. I apply this to my heart everyday and along my wrists to grab a smell anytime I need to come back to reverence.
Have you chosen a word for 2020? I would love to hear from you what you have chosen to create.
Great post! Sometimes we forget that our words can control so much. Thank you
Thanks for reading!
I was diagnosed with Lupus as a child. I know this struggle all too well. I am proud of you for continuing to spread serenity through it all!
Awww thanks friend. Wellness to you!