For most of my life, I have been an “I can” person. I can push through. I can figure it out. I can keep going, no matter what. That mindset carried me through challenges, fueled my passions, and shaped the way I moved through the world. But this past year—facing three hip surgeries, constant pain, and now preparing for yet another grueling surgery—has taught me a lesson I never expected: it’s okay to say “I can’t.”
At first, those words felt foreign, almost like giving up. I resisted them, believing that if I just tried harder, pushed a little more, I could still do everything I used to. But the reality of my healing journey forced me to pause.
I began to recognize that saying “I can’t” wasn’t about weakness—it was about truth.
It was about listening to my body instead of fighting against it. It was about setting boundaries, asking for help, and honoring what I needed, not just what I wanted to be able to do.
Learning to accept “I can’t” has brought an unexpected sense of peace. It has opened the door to self-compassion, allowing me to focus on what I can do in this season of life—whether that’s gentle movement, meaningful connection, or simply resting without guilt. It has shown me that strength isn’t measured by how much we push through, but by how well we adapt, accept, and allow ourselves to be human.
The Benefits of Accepting Limitations
Accepting our limitations doesn’t mean giving up—it means making space for a different kind of growth. Here are a few ways this shift has been a gift in my life:
- Less Pressure, More Peace – Releasing the need to always push forward has allowed me to be more present. Instead of feeling like I’m falling short, I’m learning to embrace where I am.
- Deeper Self-Compassion – Saying “I can’t” doesn’t mean I’m failing; it means I’m honoring my needs. This mindset shift has allowed me to treat myself with the same kindness I would offer a loved one.
- More Meaningful Connections – When I let go of the need to do everything on my own, I opened myself up to receiving help and support from others. That vulnerability has deepened my relationships in ways I never expected.
- Redefining Strength – True strength isn’t about endurance at all costs; it’s about knowing when to pause, when to ask for help, and when to let go.
- Finding New Possibilities – While I may not be able to do certain things the way I used to, I’ve discovered new ways to move, teach, and connect. Accepting my limitations has made room for fresh opportunities.
If you’re struggling with your own limitations—whether physical, emotional, or something else entirely—know that “I can’t” is not the end of your story. It’s an invitation to shift, to soften, and to embrace life as it is, rather than how we think it should be. And sometimes, that shift brings more healing than any amount of pushing ever could.
For me, I have even learned that saying “I can’t” to mowing the lawn or doing heavier house work has brought so much freedom into my life. I never thought I would be okay with handing over the reigns of the lawn mower to a paid yard boy but it is truly amazing!
Have you ever had to learn to be okay with saying “I can’t”? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences. ?
