Life sometimes becomes so busy and hard that I have learned to take a step back and let the dust settle when I feel like I am one step too close to the edge. At least that is what has been going on in my world. While most things in my life are extraordinarily amazing, some of it has been equally stressful and emotional. I know that the best thing for me to do is get outside, get my hands dirty, and be productive. Some people freeze under stress and I am the exact opposite. The more I can accomplish in a day when I feel like I am going to explode, the better I feel. Not sure what that coping strategy might fall in the fight/flight/freeze realm, but getting stuff done is where I cope.
Literally a month ago I softly uttered the words —maybe I should open up one of my Fridays to see more students since my schedule is so packed and the demand is so great. Within a week of saying that a huge agency asked if I could add TEN memory care assisted living homes to my already swamped schedule. Sometimes when we speak something vague the universe hears it and runs with it! There is no way I could do ten homes in one day, so I chose to go from zero teaching on Fridays to every Friday teaching in four homes. And, another local agency serving adults with traumatic brain injuries doubled their services with me.
Last week was my first week of doubled time locally and full days on Friday. I am going to be honest….by Friday at 3pm I decided that if I had to say “take a breath in and blow out a candle” one more time I was either going to lose my mind or cry.
Complicate my exhaustion of driving over 850 miles in four days, teaching 18 hard classes, and dealing with constant pain, I also needed to step up in the mom arena these last couple weeks. For the record, when a young mom complains of the demands of a toddler I kindly tell them to fasten their seatbelt because being a parent to an adult child is one of the hardest things you’ll ever go through. You have to trust that your wisdom will be heard and accepted–much different than putting them in PJ’s and sending them to bed at 7pm.
I realized today as I was having my productivity ass kicking session of washing both my cars, planting lettuces, spinach and arugula, trimming trees, fixing fountains, coloring my girls hair, finalizing contracted social media work, and cleaning the house, that I am so grateful for the community that I have.
In hard times it’s great to know that I am surrounded by people who care and are interested in becoming their best selves. If you are a reader of this blog you are either here for amazing recipes, or essential oil uses, or maybe you are here for inspiration and hope. Whatever brings you back, I realize that in a huge way this outlet gives me the support I think I need to carry on.
I also realized today that I have done hard things before. Many times. Whether it is raise three kiddos alone, navigating the unknown territory of developmental disabilities, or building a business from nothing, or leaving a loveless and controlling relationship that gave me financial safety and security to venture out with just a truck full of belongings and start all over at age 43.
I have done hard. And I have not only survived, but I have thrived. I know that this too shall pass with my kid and I will find my rhythm in adding a huge amount of demanding work to my schedule.
After all, I am not alone, right? I know that I have thousands of people all over the world whose energy comes to me through platforms like these and that in my hardest days, I can still feel that energy. Community and feeling connected is where we survive hard times. I know that I cannot do this life alone and continue to make a difference in the lives of others. Isn’t that essence of community anyway?
So, thank you. Thank you for carrying me on the tough days and allowing me an outlet to write, cry, laugh, cook, inspire, create and mostly, to love.
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