Acknowledging the Goodness

In recent weeks I have been coming up with strategies to ease my aching heart about the obviously very different Thanksgiving celebration that this year will hold. On one hand, I am incredibly grateful for the health and happiness within my family and close friends, but I am also allowing myself to feel the very real disappointment and sadness that is present when I face the grim reality that I won’t be spending this years annual holiday surrounded by food, festivities, and of course, family.

In the big picture I realize that it is just one day. One measly 24-hour period that can easily be made up when this all passes with a bounty of food and connection.

And yet, I also have a strong need to acknowledge the sadness and emptiness that the lack of tradition brings to my heart. There is in fact a hole that is empty of the connection that regardless of how busy our lives are, people come together for one day of family.

I will miss that.

I have given myself a few days to notice the missing parts of the tradition that I love so much. I love the hectic amount of cooking, the matching orange, brown and red table decorations, and even the ridiculous turkey shaped salt and pepper shakers. I love to see my sons interact and jive each other while their sister tries to sheepishly engage. I love to see the history of our lives be woven together again for a few short hours.

Now that I have had my time to feel what I feel, I am ready to rumble with making new traditions. I decided to switch up my classic food items a bit and prepare a few new dishes. After spending some time prepping yesterday I came to the realization that cooking for two is much easier than fourteen, so there is some beauty there. I also realized that my kids are making their own traditions and that is what I always wanted. I had always hoped that they would grow up to truly own their life and create experiences for themselves that nurture their unique spirit.

As the turkey gets put into the oven today, I am reminded of all the good. I have raised two fantastic men, I have a warm ad cozy house, my career fulfills me and I am truly loved. Those are the things that matter. The memories and traditions will be locked into my heart space with fondness, and today I choose to take abundant breaths and soak in the quietude of the day knowing that all is well.