strength

Inner Strength: The Pros and Cons

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For as long as I can remember, inner strength has been my guiding force. It has carried me through life’s challenges, helping me create a life filled with purpose, growth, and resilience. I’ve always prided myself on being independent, capable, and strong. But this past year—navigating hip surgery and the long road to recovery—has challenged me in a way I never expected.

The Power of Inner Strength:
I have always believed in pushing forward, finding solutions, and relying on my own willpower to overcome obstacles. This mindset helped me build my career, follow my passions, and navigate personal hardships. I thrived in my independence, knowing I could count on myself no matter what.

The Unexpected Challenge of Recovery:
But then, recovery forced me to slow down. It demanded patience, rest, and something I had never been fully comfortable with—accepting help. At first, I resisted. I wanted to prove I could still handle everything on my own. But the truth is, healing doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens when we allow ourselves to be supported.

Learning to Receive:
This year has been a profound lesson in a different kind of strength—the strength to receive, to soften, and to let others in. I have learned that true resilience is not about doing everything alone, but about recognizing when we need to lean on others. Accepting help is not weakness; it is an act of trust and courage.

Closing Reflection:
As I continue on this journey, I am embracing a new balance between strength and surrender. I still honor my independence, but I now understand that there is immense power in allowing ourselves to be supported. Sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is open our hearts and say, “Yes, I need help.”

What about you? Have you ever struggled with asking for help? Let’s start a conversation—I’d love to hear your thoughts.

To hear about my personal story with inner strength and why I have a certain tattoo, listen to this!

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Being Strong

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One thing that I have learned for sure over the last eight months, being strong certainly has its advantages.

Thankfully, strength has carried me most of my adult life and continues to do so. The advantages of being strong is the ability to face challenges with the upmost of grace and yet, fierce determination. I rarely get rattled and usually let triggers roll right off my back because I honestly don’t have time for it. The ability to have solid boundaries in place is one of the gifts strength allows you.

One of the disadvantages of being strong is that people assume that it’s easy, it must not be *that* bad, or that you’re always okay.

None of that is true.

Another disadvantage is that people will often challenge your strength by telling you that despite being strong, you most certainly need the help of others. Which I mostly disagree with. I need help when I need help, not based on someone else’s opinion of when THEY think I need help.

Truth is I am strong. Rarely to my own detriment, but instead most often to my benefit.

In the coming weeks I will be asked to be strong again as I face more challenges with my hip. When the plan is in place, I will share it.

Until then, I carry on. With strength, of course.

Hip Replacement Update

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Many have asked and wondered how the ol’ hip replacement is healing. The hip is eh…the arm is not.

I have gone back to work and mostly doing what I want to be doing….however the pain is still very prominent. I adjust things constantly and have adapted almost everything in my life so that I can carry on. It still takes great effort to do everyday things. I stopped using a cane awhile ago because it was aggravating my arm…more on that.

I will see the infectious disease doctor later this month to check status of the infection.

When the infection arose I had a picc line (IV) placed and that caused a blood clot in my arm. Then my body made more clots. The blood clots in my arm have taken up space and seem to like living there rent free. Sadly, after a recent ultrasound it shows the veins are chronically inflamed and damaged from the DVT and superficial clots. The solution is finding comfort and not aggravating it. She suggested not lifting anything heavy or doing heavy work and minimize stretching it.

She also said this is permanent damage that rarely resolves.

So there is that.

It seems my adult life has been one opportunity after another to show up, to be strong and forge through challenges.

I am so so so grateful that I have the strength I do.

Onward.

No Shame

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I had a recent conversation with someone about body shame. For many years of my adult life I was heavy and carried around an extra 80 or so pounds. I have experienced fat-girl shame. It isn’t fun. And yet, I have also experienced skinny-girl shame. That isn’t fun either. I wonder sometimes why we can’t just be kinder people.

The answer for me came in the way of self love. I didn’t love who I was—not because I was fat but because I was toxic and heavy in every area of my life.

It was exhausting so I decided to love instead.

Simply love myself. As I began to love myself it became inherently easy to love others, too.

With my new found self love I came to know that I am an enneagram one. I am a perfectionist and I hold myself to high standards. I also am an overcomer of obstacles. I rarely see something as unobtainable or impossible. I see the good in most everyone and am exploding with positivity. It is unusual for me to be emotional (something I am trying to open myself up to). I am steady as steady can be. I thrive feeling safe.

Taking control of my health and my body fueled me and I began to thrive.

No shame in owning that.

I also struggle with daily chronic pain. It takes a ton of discipline to continue to work my body into its best health. I honor my body and refuse to let her down by focusing on pain or limitations. Instead I look her in the eye and tell her she can do it. I have a strong sense of self and am in awe of what my body can do.

No shame in owning that either.

As years go by, I continue to tenderly speak to the large sized woman I once was and thank her for being patient with me.

Being on both sides of the size spectrum and feeling both types of shame I am convinced we need to lose the shame game. Give people the grace to be who they are.

Deal?

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