brain injuries

What is Your Intention?

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As I have opened myself up in my quest for vulnerability this year and to take something I am passionate about and share it more openly in my adaptive yoga teacher mentoring program, I am asked to look at what I do through a different lens and be open to understanding and learning, while also being confident in myself and what I know to be effective.

Since yoga truly is a practice for daily life and not the ability to touch our toes, I find myself curious how other yoga teachers and/or practitioners view intention. Is having an intention and a plan for the class the same?

For everyone else, is an intention for your day the same as your plan for the day? I don’t think so. I believe we set an intention in our day, or our teaching (example to be present) and our plan may need to adjust according to what shows up in the day or in the yoga session.

I am fairly clear on my intention within a general sense when I am teaching yoga, however we all know that “reading the room” is key. This ability to switch gears in a yoga class is also helpful in life because let’s face it, how many times do we have a plan and we need to change it suddenly. Having this emotional resiliency and ability to be flexible in our minds is a useful tool for everyone.

Here is where my vulnerability was poked yesterday. I had someone observe me yesterday in one of my houses and she asked me afterwards something along the lines of is that all they ever “do” in class and could they “do” more? I knew when she said that she was referring to “doing” more of the physical stuff of yoga.

Hmmm….we chatted about it and as I reflected on it throughout the day I realized that not only have I overcome insecurities about myself, I have also found that the foundation in myself and my work is incredibly strong. This was not always the way I felt and it has taken me polishing myself over the years to remove the doubts and fears and step into being vulnerable enough to share what I do with others in a very real sense. This also allows an opening for me to learn and continue to polish.

This is my truth–When I enter a group home or assisted living setting to share yoga, I have an intention which is to always value them and see them.

As we entering the house, my plan for class had to shift once I was there a few minutes and we finished the check in.  I ALWAYS do a check in and this is so important to what I believe is a great method that I have developed over time.  In the check-in they get to answer how is their mind, body and spirit. This is something I believe we ALL need to do on a daily basis because it helps us to pause, assess ourselves so we know what we need.  By answering these questions in a simply one or two word answer, it also opens the door for vulnerability, connection, empathy and much more.

The group on this day had just three students. The most able bodied student was out and the three that gathered in the living room included one who is partially paralyzed with no movement in left arm and minimal in left leg, one who suffers from severe PTSD and pain, and one who has very little motor control and incredible low self esteem as a result. This is a group who are working very hard on acceptance, grief and how to integrate themselves into their current lives following their injuries.

During the check in I learned that one student was tired but good, and another answered like this:  mind-broken, body-broken, spirit-more broken. The tired student had a hard time sitting up straight and suffers from neck and back pain, so using the soft couch for support was where he was at.  The student who felt he was broken has very little control of his body and the moment he feels a sense of failure, he quits. His tremors and lack of coordination is embarrassing to him and if he struggles, he 99% of the time will stop movement and just listen. The one who is partially paralyzed needs hand over hand support for lifting his arm and leg.

Did I need to switch gears? Heck yes.

Why? Because my intention is to value them and to see them.

I saw that they were struggling physically and my sense was that they needed the connection and opportunity to be seen more than they they needed to be challenged physically or “do” more.  In my mind they were “doing” a lot by engaging, talking, sharing openly, and being present. For these guys, trust is HUGE and they chose to sit around the living and participate.

If I kept my class plan and/or asked them to do something new/hard/unfamiliar it is likely on this particular day, it would have caused them to bail. Since my intention is in valuing them, by adjusting my plan and giving them space to share and move easily in their bodies, they were able to feel successful in a world where they have little success. This touches on their past trauma, their present challenges and how connection and being seen can fuel confidence in them. 

Yes, we did some movement and we did some breathing. We learned a simple sequence that is heart based and tapped into a softer side. Yes, we learned about energy and reciprocity of giving and receiving.  We learned about faith in ourselves and something greater than ourselves.  We shared our gratitudes. 

While all of this magic was going on, dishes were being banged, conversations being loudly had, people in and out, distraction after distraction.  Hard?  Very.

For the yoga teachers out there, what is YOUR intention when teaching? Does your intention change based on your students in class and is your intention different than your class plan?

For everyone, what is your intention? How do you want to interact with the world today? Begin your day by setting an intention and then make choices to align with that.

xo, Stacie

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The Last One

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In many of my experiences walking into into a group home to share Yoga I am often met with much reluctance. I think this is partly because so many view yoga as it is something you do on the floor with a somewhat healthy body in strange shapes.

For someone in a wheelchair this idea seems obviously impossible and out of their ability or comfort zone, and rightly so.

Several years ago I was standing in the kitchen of a home a couple years ago trying my best to cajole a few guys into joining me. I often have to frame it in terms of “hey, come over here and hang out with me for a minute”. I get to chatting and asking them questions and engaging in them, and then usually before long I have them hook, line and sinker. This particular day was just that except that the only person in the kitchen was a large man who made several wisecracks to me about doing yoga.

I started with my usual onslaught of engaging questions like what did you have for lunch, did you see who won the football game, what is your favorite season, how long have you lived in Colorado, etc. Within a few minutes, we are in a deep conversation about the mountains and things we agree make Colorado awesome. After a short while passed and he made another crack about yoga, I giggled and said we had actually just been practicing yoga for the last fifteen minutes.

I explained to him what the definition and essence of yoga is and that is exactly what we have been doing. Gotcha! I exclaimed as he grumbled something about weird yoga people. I offered him a professional foot rub and the rest is history.

Since that day, he and I have met twice a month for 1:1 yoga for over two years.

Here is what it looks like—I arrive and wake up him for a nap, I insist he come out of his room (he prefers isolation and even though I honor his preference, part of the deal with me is some resemblance of boundaries and expectations), he shuffles his large and partially paralyzed body to an easy chair in the living room, I plop down on the floor and rub his feet and then with his permission I move his body for him. I stretch his left side and listen to his horrible wise-cracks and jokes.

Just like that, I was able to get a skeptic to see that Yoga is union, coming together and finding a sense of self in the moment.

In time I have watched as his confidence grew and we went from me moving his left side to him agreeing to arm wrestle me, pull me up from the floor and reach for me. Prior to Yoga he often said “I can’t move my left arm, it is paralyzed”. Now he sees that while it may not be as strong as it was before his accident, it is moving some and he is building strength in his once really strong arms.

After about a year of working with this man I arrived one day to learn he was in the intensive care unit. It didn’t occur to me once to not swiftly drive over to the hospital and complete our yoga session there.

He was intubated but awake when I walked into the strange sights, smells and sounds of an ICU. I introduced myself to his nurse and explained I was his yoga teacher. The quizzical look on her face was something I see often when people don’t fully get what I do. I asked her if I could rub his feet and she agreed that he would probably like that. As I stood next to his head to say hello, his eyes opened and he looked shocked to see me. I teased him that he couldn’t get out of yoga by being in the ICU so we better get busy. His eyes filled with tears and even though he couldn’t speak, I understood what he was saying.

As I finished up rubbing his feet and was packing my things his heart rate and breathing became labored and alarms got louder and louder. His oxygen was tanking despite being on a ventilator. I instinctively put my hand on his chest and said “Watch me. Breathe with me”. After about 30 rounds of deep breathing, his numbers returned to as normal as they could given his situation. The nurse stood with her eyes wide open. I told him I was going to glue a picture of my face to the ceiling so that every time his oxygen dropped he’d see my face and remember to breathe. His eyes twinkled.

It is one of my greatest pleasures to showcase my students’ yoga practice to people who would never see yoga through this particular lens. The first feat is getting the students to see it’s not twisted bodies on the floor, the second is showing staff or caregivers the possibilities. Moving his body for him created not only connection but also the movement his once healthy body still desired.

This beautiful soul had his last foot rub a couple weeks ago and took his final breath this week. I will deeply miss our time together and what he gave my life. It is usually the least likely Yoga students that bring me the most. I hope that he valued our time together as much as I did. He was a special one.

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Twigs and Trash

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In order to grow we must first remove what it is in the way.

For many years I have been teaching the concept that much like a garden we have outside, before we can plant anything and expect it to grow, we first have to remove all the old stuff, the trash and the things that are cluttering the soil. Today, as I was doing that exact literal thing in my backyard raking leaves and removing last years dead plants that were once so vibrant, I was reminded of the conversation I had this week with a group of men who have traumatic brain injures.

I teach this topic every March, regardless of who is in my classes because I think no matter who you are and what your life experience is, we all have something that is cluttering up our heart and therefore limiting the potential we have to grow. This might be something like fear, disappointment, regret, guilt, shame, resentment, anger or any other feeling and emotion that we have carried around for days or decades.

As I was guiding a meditation about visualizing a garden and seeing the old growth, the twigs and the trash, I asked them each to see a garden in their heart that may also have some things that could be getting in the way of growth.

I shared with my ‘frat house’ that they have fondly referred to themselves as, that I have some disappointment that is taking up space in my own heart. I carry it day after day, year after year and despite all my attempts to pull it out, it seems to have a root system that is deep and new shoots pop up and take over my heart at times.

As we had a discussion about this, they called me out on it and the wise man who developed a life changing brain tumor at age 23 gave me the best insight on how to manage all the little twigs and trash that take up space. He is turning 60 in a a few weeks and following his diagnosis while in his final year of college his life has been a series of assisted living settings and long term support. He lost his independence and so much more, and yet is so wise.

Are you ready for this? In my humbleness, I asked how does one remove all the “twigs and trash” from our hearts. I asked how do I remove the disappointment?

He shared that you can never fully rid of every twig or piece of trash that has landed in the garden, instead you have to learn to manage and grow around them.

Huh, I said.

Tell me more, I said.

He went on to say that the remnants of the the “twigs” and “trash” will likely always be there and sometimes they may stick out of the soil and poke you but our job is to plants things around them so the beauty takes over.

Again, I asked how.

The wise teacher said:

  • forgiveness
  • acceptance
  • gratitude

When we forgive ourselves and others we remove so much of the garbage that fills our heart. This removes resentment, bitterness, and what-if thinking. When we accept was IS we no longer grieve for what might have been which brings presence to growing today. And finally, when we focus on being grateful we see all that we have, not all that we do not have.

How’s that for insightful?

It’s not so much about removing the parts of our heart that impede growth, but rather moving them aside through forgiveness, acceptance and gratitude so that we make space for something far more amazing to grow.

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Like I Matter

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Can you say that your actions give light to the darkness that others experience?

Alone somewhere in an assisted living group home sits a woman who like many I get to see had a life changing event where everything that she knew was instantly gone. She lost her family, her job, her home, and possibly her purpose.

Everyday is the same existence; eat, sleep, eat, maybe occasionally go into the community, eat, sleep, repeat. There is never a visitor and never anything that provides meaning to her day. I show up once per month to attempt some group yoga classes, however, most of the women living in this house decline to attend, except this lovely lady I will call Patricia.

On my last visit I had the opportunity to work 1:1 with her and address some of her challenges. I knew she had a painful shoulder from her accident and subsequent surgeries so I wanted to see if I could get some pain relief and mobility into her shoulder. Like all my sessions, there is a lot of dialogue and attempts to find connection. I know from my nearly two decades of teaching yoga to unique populations, the one thing that they want more than any physical practice is to feel part of something and to feel seen.

Isn’t that a universal desire? I believe our greatest human need it to simply be seen.

For the hour that we spent together, I learned about her accident and what her life was life before the event. I learned about her dreams, her mistakes, her shame and her hopes for her life. I learned what it means to her to be a mom and a grandmother. I learned that we are the same age, minus a few months difference. I learned about her hard upbringing and getting lost in her youth. I learned the details of her accident that was nearly thirty years ago.

For thirty years, Patricia has lived in this same existence. Thirty years is more than half her life. Half of her life has been lived alone, isolated, without meaning and incredibly lonely.

Towards the end of our session, I wanted to have a closer look at her shoulder and see if I would be able to get some movement and comfort into her body. I whipped out my trusted essential oil blend for pain and began to apply it slowly and gently to her arm and shoulder area. Human touch has a powerful effect and is so under implemented in our sterile world. No words were exchanged as I gently moved her arm in circles and into extension and flexion. I was careful to not do much as I did not know for sure the extent of her surgery and rehab.

I asked her, “how does that feel?”

She looked at me, and with tears in her eyes, she said, “like I matter”.

I rarely show my emotions, especially with my students. I am incredibly careful and cognizant of not coming across as a person who pities them or feels “bad” for them. That is not what they want, but her words struck my heart and tears filled my eyes instantly.

Can you imagine feeling so lonely and forgotten that simply having one person pay attention to you for thirty minutes gives you the feedback that you truly do matter?

Her answer had nothing to do with her shoulder pain and everything to do with her heart pain. I knew that in that instant, I was exactly where I was supposed to be, and she gave me such a gift that day.

I continue to think about how my actions remind people that they do matter. I get to be the giver of goodness. I get the privilege of sharing my day with them and learning how to make a difference in the lives of others.

When was the last time you felt like you matter? When was the last time you helped someone see that they matter? You just never know how your actions are influencing others. Can you say that your actions give light to the darkness that others experience?

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Telling Your Story

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“You may find that making a difference for others makes the biggest difference in you.”

Over the years I have had the opportunity to share my story a few times through interviews and podcasts and each time I get to tell it I realize that it wasn’t until I literally woke up and stepped into acceptance and gratitude that my life began to transform into greatness.

We all have a story and hopefully we all have opportunities to tell it and use it as a springboard to inspire others. This recent interview cut right to the chase of what I do and why.

What’s your business, and who are your customers?

I teach adaptive Yoga and wellness to individuals living in an assisted living setting with traumatic brain injuries.

Tell us about yourself

I am the mother and caregiver to an adult daughter with a disability, and I had initially found yoga for myself to help with stress and self-confidence. I soon realized that it was much more than that. I believe that when I allowed healing to come to my heart and sadness and find acceptance for the struggles I had been a single mom to three little kids and one significantly disabled, I was able to see that perhaps my girl was a beautiful door that opened for me to share yoga with those unable to access traditional yoga settings. I am now contracted with over 100 individuals per month with TBI and have become a success in my field. I am motivated by my students and their resiliency and how their trauma has influenced them to be their best selves. I am inspired by them in every class I get to share with them.

What’s your biggest accomplishment as a business owner?

My biggest accomplishment has been showing individuals that yoga is not about the physical body and that the intent is to find wholeness within themselves. I am so proud of the method that I have developed that has shown over a decade of success using yoga as a modality to find contentment, inner awareness, and life after injury.

What’s one of the hardest things that comes with being a business owner?

The hardest part is having enough time to reach all my students, learning to say no, and keeping myself healthy in mind, body, and spirit to be able to continue to show up as my best self.

What are the top tips you’d give to anyone looking to start, run and grow a business today?

  1. Market effectively.
  2. Be yourself and use your passion to fuel your business.
  3. Be willing to always keep learning.

Where can people find you and your business?

Website: https://sites.google.com/view/embracingspirityoga/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/embracingspirityoga/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/embracingspirityoga/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stacie-wyatt-4ab7a3120/

*interview courtesy of Team Subkit

Having the opportunity to share Yoga and wellness in the community with individuals unable to access a traditional setting has been life changing for me. I hope that you find ways that your story can influence and help others. It is through our own growth that we give others permission to do the same.

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Confinement

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I often say that I am putting all of the amazing nuggets of wisdom that come from my students with brain injuries into my future book and to share on my future Ted Talk. Wouldn’t that be amazing?

Year after year and class after class, I am humbled at the insights that come from people living with brain injuries and feel so strongly that they can teach the world so many things about truly living. Over the years I have kept a little notebook with some of the teachings that they bring to my life and will often pull inspiration from that notebook in my everyday classes or in my personal life.

This one is a keeper.

I have been teaching from the theme of freedom this month. According to Webster’s dictionary, freedom is defined as having the ability to think, speak and act without hindrance or restraint. As we broke down each of those areas and shared the hinderances in our lives it is easy to see that everyone has certain hinderances or restraints that keep them from living fully free. For some, it is living without the ability to move their legs, or for others it is not being able to drive or work. For me although I can drive and work, I have certain physical limitations and responsibilities that keep me from being fully free in my actions.

We then moved onto our ability to speak without hinderance or restraint and it was evident that while the idea of free speech exists, there is a limitation to what we can all say and not get into a little hot water, whether that it within our own home or in the community.

We finished our discussion with the realization that the only true place we have freedom is in our thoughts. We are all free to think what we think and no matter what our challenges or our struggles are, it is ultimately what do with it through our mindset.

Here is the moment of ah-ha that has stayed in my heart for weeks. As we were closing up our discussion on living freedom, this was spoken:

“The confinement that I feel is only what I ALLOW myself to feel.”

Read that again.

The woman who said this is a student who lives in assisted living and occasionally comes down for yoga. Her body is riddled with pain so her practice is breathing and sharing. She is brave and wise.

She also lost her independence, her family, her ability to work and drive, and basically do the things that feed her soul. And yet she has the insight to see that despite all of her lack of freedoms, she can escape the cage with her thoughts.  She is one of the most insightful and grateful people I have ever met.

And to think that I am called the teacher.

Truth is, I am a conduit for their wisdom. I get to be the messenger. 

Seeking Yoga Teachers

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When I began my own personal practice of yoga I was doing it for all the reasons many of us do–increase flexibility, get leaner and stronger, and stretch the tight muscles. What I discovered in the process of learning and doing all of that is the true essence of Yoga–which is union; with myself and with others.

It was also at this time that I was embarking on a self-discovery quest that lead me down many paths, and ultimately opened some amazing doors for my own personal growth.

I had dove deep into my soul and realized that I am here to do great things and in order to do that, I had A LOT of healing in my heart to
do. (My recent podcast explains it all). When I found the space in my heart that anger no longer was consuming, I filled it with life changing love.

I have been hustling in and out of assisted living, rehab centers and group homes for over thirteen years, specializing in people with brain injuries. It is the most rewarding work I can ever imagine and it is SO needed in every community.

I know that there are some awesome heart centered Yoga teachers out there that are tired of the high focus on the physical form that our western culture emphasizes, and who have the heart to touch the lives of unique individuals.

I need YOU. I want to share this very special population with YOU so that you can go into your communities and feel confident teaching Yoga to individuals with disabilities.

I am currently taking applications for adaptive yoga teacher mentorship. Learn more!

Together we can do so much more.

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Embracing Spirit Yoga