Embracing Spirit Yoga

Eleven years ago I created my business known as Embracing Spirit Yoga. At that time I had been sharing yoga for awhile but hadn’t stepped into full time teaching. I decided to take the gigantic leap into the unknown, quit my j.o.b. and trust that my purpose would sustain me.

It never occurred to me to be a yoga teacher. I realized through my own awakening that there are many people who could not easily access a yoga class. Sharing mindfulness, body awareness and connection to the Self became my passion.

I also never wanted to be an entrepreneur. I dabbled with the idea of being a social worker. The funny thing is many of my social work friends now tell me my work is a beautiful version of social work. I spent years working in special education and raising my own unique kid sure paved some ways of understanding differences. Being an advocate for people with different abilities was also so important to me. Having all those pieces come together was a mystery.

Then it happened

People assume that teaching yoga full-time must be so “fun”. I would not describe it as fun. However it IS what I believe I am here to do. I believe 100% that I was given my special daughter to lead me down a path of teaching yoga to people with disabilities. The road with her hasn’t been easy. It is easier to see now that it certainly has gifted me with amazing compassion.

The beginning

Since I began my business in 2011, I have shared yoga in countless group homes and assisted living settings. Being a regular at nursing homes and beside in hospice has been so enlightening. I teach to all types of abilities in a variety of settings, including a small private studio. To some who witness a group of us huddled around a coffee table on leather furniture in a living room they may question if that is really a yoga class. Most of my settings are not perfectly curated yoga spaces with flickering candles, dimly lit room and soft comfortable pillows along the wall.

The classes I teach are designed to be accessible anywhere.

It has been a wonderful eleven years and I have grown so much as a person and as a teacher. I could not have succeeded and been able to touch so many lives without the support of others; my students, my family, my friends and those who have taken a chance on my offerings and who have seen first hand the dedication I give to my students. To some it may seem like I am frazzled and running like crazy. Those who love and respect me see that the hard work is a reflection of my passion for serving those with disabilities.

Every person who has generously said yes to my teachings has made the last eleven years magical and I am so thankful.

Grateful doesn’t even begin to capture what my heart feels.

If you are curious and want to learn more about what I do, check out this informative webpage and read about what I believe to be the foundation of any quality yoga class.

Simple Kindness

About six years ago I had a new student come into my classes who later proved to become a sweet friend who never asked for recognition for his mysterious, and always anonymous generosity. He was the example of simple kindness.

If you knew him, you may have not been able to recognize that he was a person living with a traumatic brain injury or that he struggled with all types of pain. His outlook and hash tag on life was #lovemylife. He never complained and was always up for a positive spin on things.

Through the years, I shared yoga and mindfulness with him. I schooled him on the proper way to eat cold chicken (only with mustard). I proudly sent him pictures of my garden bounty and the hikes I took. He returned this with endless versions of simple kindness; countless bags of chocolates delivered to my door, things for my shoes so I don’t slip on ice, he would send his own pictures of amazing hikes, and we often compared notes on Saturday steak nights.

Our friendship was based on simple kindness between two people.

Despite very different lifestyles we connected. What was most intriguing was our communication was only through texting. We disagreed politically and on issues we are both passionate about. Rather than attempt to convince each other that our view was the right view, we chose instead to focus on kindness. We chose to share things with each other that embodied what it meant to live your best life. He cracked lame jokes and always asked me about my health. I made sure he knew I was around and that he was on my mind from time to time.

Simple kindness was the theme of our friendship.

A few weeks ago, I went to see him in person in the hospital as he battled for his life. I rubbed his feet and brought him lemonade. Words were minimal and not needed.

His illness, injuries and life of pain came to an end recently. I know that what he was facing was not living his best life. He also knew it. His need to escape society and head to the woods for months at a time was not something he would be able to do.

I knew his fear and his pain.

Taking a much needed a hike in the trees, I had little chat with him and wished him well on his soul path. As I finished saying my goodbyes, I snapped this photo of the hill I was climbing and the light beam was such an obvious sign.

Nicely done, Scott. I will treasure your spirit and the gift your life was on my path. Enjoy the trees, the hawks and the views.

Inclusion Yoga

Inclusion Yoga is a dynamic form of living and sharing the true essence of Yoga that embraces as its main focus the principles of inclusion.


The dim lights of the Yoga space were easy on the eyes.  The wood floors were cool to the feet that padded along in eager anticipation for the arrival of Yogis. Voices of fellow Yoga teachers whispered around the room.  Candles flickered with shared excitement.

The energy itself was touchable.

As I knelt on my mat prior to the first arrival I witnessed in myself an acknowledgement of what brought me to this day.  With sweet tears, I first saw my beautiful daughter.  Images of her sweet life from birth to this day.  Without her being in my life–exactly as she is–I would not be sitting on that mat preparing to meet my vision.

Next, I remembered my first Yoga class where I was the student.  I remembered my first teacher gently planting seeds that I would soon discover about myself and about Yoga.  I remembered my first Yoga conference when I was eager with excitement and driven to be doing it “right”.

Being told to just be yourself and teach from your heart were wise words given to me.

This moment was indeed divinely guided.

The room filled and people settled in.  Mats were placed in a circle; a circle of inclusion, of equality and of acceptance.

I dropped to my knees and felt the tears sting my eyes as I saw my friend in her wheelchair arrive.  She was the exact reason my heart knew that this calling was not to be ignored.

At that moment, I knew that I was exactly where I was supposed to be.

I spoke my truth and I taught from my heart.  There was inclusion and pure acceptance.  I got to see huge willingness and courage.  

Witnessing pure love.

I closed the class in complete wonder for what just occurred and with a reading of how it began.  There was deep gratitude for the faith people had in me. Also for the support from others and for the opportunity.

Years that the foundation of inclusion is the essence.

I am blessed to bring adaptive yoga into long term care centers, assisted living setting and group homes. To learn more about my services, check out this gorgeous webpage that explains it all.

Aligning Your Thoughts with Your Actions

The teaching that I always return to is really so simple: align your thoughts with your actions and your life will change.

The month of March has been historically a month when where major changes occur in my own life. As I look back I see that I started the wakeup of my life that I refer to so often, I took my first Yoga class, did my first Yoga teacher training, taught my first Yoga class, and hosted my first community inclusion Yoga class where able bodied people practiced along side people in wheelchairs and other disabilities all in the month of March. You can see something fiery happens to me during the month of March and magic really starts to happen.

About seventeen years ago I woke up exhausted again and said to myself, “I am done being fat”.  I literally heard the words “I am done”. I had lived with extra weight since my first pregnancy when I was eighteen years old.  Within just four years of my first kiddo, there were three little babies and a bunch of added pounds.  Being fully invested in being a momma I had no idea that not investing in myself was actually a disservice to them.

Not the healthiest

Carrying the extra weight also meant that I was clearly eating foods that were not the healthiest and I was doing no exercise or self-care at all. There was every excuse in the world as to why I was unable to lose weight; healthy food costs so much, I don’t have time, I am too busy, I can’t afford a gym, etc.

Clearly my mind, body and spirit were so disconnected. 

The day in March that I woke up and decided that I was done was in alignment with the world around me where spring was just beginning. When I think back of that time, I realize that I too was in a rebirthing or awakening from a dark and long slumber. I was beginning the journey of my own form of blossoming.

My plan consisted of many things

The foundation of it all began not with the outer or my physical body. Instead it started with cleaning up my inner world. 

My thoughts.

Course of action

The first course of action was waking up up one hour earlier each morning and start my day with quiet, contemplative reading.  I journaled every single morning.  My journal entries at that time were not a recount of my day or diary-like at all. I wrote affirmative statements such as “I am worth it”.  I also wrote down all that I was grateful for in the present, and all that I was grateful for that was coming to me.  It was something like this: “I am grateful for the food I have chosen to eat.  I am grateful for my healthy body”. The quiet and contemplative time was like a drink of cold water on a hot day; refreshing, awakening and invigorating.

Mindfulness

The time spent still and quiet each morning began to stoke my inner fire of mindfulness.  As I became more aware of my thoughts and was purposeful for those sixty minutes, I began to train my brain to be more aware of my thoughts throughout the day.  I started to notice when my thoughts would shift to lack or negativity. I would immediately pause to reframe them to something that was positive. I found that many times I was attaching myself to a made up story or a future based fear.  For example, when my thoughts were something like, “I am so heavy….I am a pig…..I can’t afford that…..I wouldn’t look good in that…..I am broke…..I am a mess”, I would stop and tell myself that all of that was a story and the truth was/is “I am worth it….I have plenty of money….I am beautiful….I am amazing….”

Once I began to remove the heavy and sludge-filled thoughts that were literally weighing me down, I became more deliberate in my actions.  Through the act of being mindful, I interrupted the patterns that were contributing to my extra weight and replaced those actions with healthier ones.

Healthier habits

  • My walking shoes were placed on the steps that went from my garage to my house and every day when I came home from work and before ANYTHING, I slipped on my shoes and walked 40 minutes.
  • The dog’s leash was set out and every morning–rain or shine–I walked my dogs 40 minutes before work.  I slept less but as I moved more, my body was less fatigued and required less sleep that ended up actually being more restorative.
  • The kids snacks were put in the cabinet above the fridge so it literally took a step stool to get to them.  The extra work allowed time for me to really think about how much I wanted/needed cheetos.
  • Instead of going straight to the kitchen when I got done walking, I went straight to the bathtub.  Not only did this give me a self-care ritual, it interrupted a pattern of snacking before dinner.  By the time I got out of my bath, it was time to cook and I eliminated extra calories in mindless snacking.
  • I used small salad plates for every meal which tricked my brain into thinking I was eating more.
  • I taught the kids how to wash and load their own dishes because I was eating thousands of calories in leftover chicken nuggets and fries after I just ate my dinner.
  • I invested in measuring cups and a food scale.  I did this deliberately for a short time so that I would be more intentional with my choices.
  • I logged EVERY single calorie that passed through my lips.  I did this for two and a half years!  Eventually that was an obsession that I had to let go of because it was getting in the way of joy and pleasure with food, but for the time,  I needed to learn just how much food I was over-eating.  Portions and extra wasted calories were out of control.
  • I started to love who I was.  I became passionate about ME.  I was investing in myself and the results were astounding.  I was happier, my relationships improved and my life began to be incredibly vibrant.

When asked how I did it, my answer is this:

I woke up. 

I opened my eyes to my life and I said yes to me.  I cleaned up my inner world of thoughts and as a result my actions became more deliberate.  I began to see my self-worth and choose to love myself by honoring my thoughts and actions. You see, it was not a crazy diet that was restrictive or extreme and I wasn’t killing myself at the gym (although that did come later and had its own set of deep lessons).  I just woke up and put intent into my life.

The teaching that I always return to is really so simple: align your thoughts with your actions and your life will change.

Mindset Generosity

I keep stumbling upon the word generous and I began to want to cultivate a deeper understanding of the definition.

Generous is defined as characterized by a noble or kindly spirit;  liberal in giving ; marked by abundance.

Recently during my times of walking or while spending time on the mat, I have been really looking at how generosity shows up in my life and how I can continue to bring awareness from the inward grasping of obtaining to an outward flow of giving.

If I am generous with my faith, there is no space for fear.

If I am generous with my love, there is no space for separation.

If I am generous with my money, there is no space for lack.

If I am generous with my presence, there is no space for distance.

If I am generous with my listening, there is no space for indifference.

If I am generous with my attentiveness, there is no space neglect.

If I am generous with my understanding, there is no space for ignorance.

If I am generous with my compassion, there is no space for judgment.

If I am generous with my patience, there is no space for frustration.

If I am generous with my time, there is no space for feeling overwhelmed.

If I am generous with my health, there is no space for illness.

If I am generous with my light, there is no space for dark.

Going into a much deeper level of the understanding of generous feels so free to be no longer in the mind-set of obtaining, but instead an outward flow of bestowing. My abundance allows and permits me to be generous.

How wonderfully simple.

Spring Symbolism

Ahhhh….Can you believe that spring is just around the corner? Soon we will push our clocks forward and the longer days will be upon on us. I can’t wait! I love a good snowy day, but to see the beginnings of green growth popping out is so exciting to me! Last year I had a wonderful garden and look forward to an even better one this year. Something so wonderful about growing your own veggies. My backyard is already chirping with birds and it seems so alive already.

I love spring and the symbolism it represents.

It is during the springtime that we often think of beginnings, newness, and growth. I can recall at least four times in my life that major changes occurred in March. This is a great time to begin to cultivate your “soil” so that soon you can plant seeds of intention. One way to do this is to write down anything in your life you wish to increase—friendships, health, abundance or joy, peace, etc. Be clear about your visions, review your intentions often, and dream big!

While you are preparing yourself for a season of growth, this is also a time to eliminate the old stuff of the past season that is leftover–things like thoughts of limitation, fears or doubts. That kind of clutter can easily invade your precious garden of growth. I like to think of it much like my actual garden bed in my backyard where last years leaves, twigs, trash and growth clutter and cover the soil. If I want to give the new growth any chance to break through, I better take the time to clear away the old stuff. This blog post explains it so well.

The subtle changes in nature

Another great practice that brings us into the now is to become aware of the subtle changes in Nature during this time of the year. You might see the peeking of crocus bulbs emerging from the hardened winter ground. Watch as the trees begin to grow tiny nubs that will soon break into full leaves. Listen as the birds start to make a song in the early mornings and the air has a scent of newness. Use all of your senses to experience what is happening around you.

As we connect with Nature we also connect with ourselves. We realize that we too are ever-changing and growing beings. We can set the seeds of intention and begin to nurture and cultivate what we wish to have growing in our lives. It here we are reminded of the union that Life offers.

Loving Myself

We all think we know what love is and what the definition is, but I resonate the most with how Brené Brown defines love–

We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honour the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection.

Love is not something we give or get, it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each of them – we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.

For the first 30 years of my life I thought I knew what love was and that I was living as an example of love—dependable, reliable, giving, and selfless. I’ve come to now see that what I was really offering was anything but that. I was clueless, unaware, oblivious and at times, destructive.

Not to others.

To myself.

Back when I was young, married and raising three people I was completely asleep when it came to self love. I have come to realize now however that I simply did not like who I was, so loving me was not even close to being on my radar. It is clear now that when you love yourself, you take actions that care for yourself.

Back then I had no awareness that the fast food I was consuming and the sedentary life I was living was contributing to my very large body. I never connected that the heaviness I was in my body was a direct link to the heaviness in my emotions. And then I realized that being an amazing mom wasn’t enough love. There was someone that love wasn’t shown.

Not to myself.

When I began to what I like to refer to as “wake up” and get healthy, I started to like me. I was finding dark shadows that were lurking in my heart that were asking to be let out. The beginning to many things that were literally weighing me down. I forgave others and accepted my circumstances. I began to care for me.

The logistics in which I lost weight are simple–I changed my habits. Recognizing what wasn’t working and learning to make a very conscious decision to change it was my new way.

Some of my strategies were:

  • Eating meals on small plates
  • Chewing gum while I cooked
  • Teaching others to do their dishes
  • Putting trigger foods out of sight
  • Making sure my walking shoes were always with me
  • Changing routines to avoid mindless eating (taking long baths, going for a walk, learning to garden)

You see these simple changes were to avoid be being unconscious. This influenced snacking, portions, and sedentary lifestyle choices. Many of these changes still remain part of my life.

By swapping out the mindless munching on snacks for bubble baths or a short walk, my mind was beginning to see the value in me. It is extraordinary what happens to a person’s soul when time is spent consistently alone on a walk. The changes that occurred both on the inside and outside were amazing.

I began noticing myself.

I have spent a decade and a half living like these habits; mindful eating and multiple daily walks. I even became a yoga and meditation teacher. Basically transformed myself from an angry obese woman to a healthy and happy woman.

A vibrant life was mine.

Then I got injured.

For the last seven years I have dealt with healing from four orthopedic surgeries and learning to live with chronic pain. This body that I had worked so hard to become healthy began to defile me. It was as if she was rebelling against this lifestyle of health and fitness.

Feelings of deep sadness came.

While I have maintained a healthy weight for over 20 years, I have struggled with trusting my body. The multiple diagnoses felt at times like a betrayal. In truth, I spent a solid 10 adult years living on double cheeseburgers, fries and chicken nuggets without a stitch of pain or health issues.

How did I begin to develop inflammatory issues when I was now living my best life? My body’s ability to climb mountains, race bicycles, practice endless hours of yoga, walk miles and miles each day was endless..

And yet, my body was struggling.

I have since learned to accept what is. Learning to continue on living an extraordinary happy and healthy life despite pain.Making daily choices around movement vs sitting. Or ice cream vs a single bite of dark chocolate. And binging on stupid tv vs a long bubble bath. I’ve been extremely happy with the self love I have discovered by nurturing myself.

Loving myself.

The game changed about six months ago when I stumbled onto a strength training program. I was completely content with my body and it’s strength and flexibility-and my size- but was intrigued by this idea of committing to something new.

Questions of worthiness immediately rose to the surface. The excuses were miles long. (I can’t do that because of my hip, that will hurt my ankle, I don’t need to do burpees, I don’t have enough weights, my body is “good enough”).

Deep down I knew that all of that internal dialogue didn’t sound much like loving myself. And I knew it.

So I began October 1st. A brand new love affair with myself. And like any new love there have bumps along the way—days I doubted myself and had some pretty bad words spoken, days I wanted to give up and go back to the inner narrative that I was “good enough”.

Those challenging days of the early love affair with my 51 year old self are gone. Now, I am in complete awe of what I have been able to do and overcome. I am happily shocked at the human body and it’s ability to transform. No longer held back by the story of age or injury, instead I am madly loving my ability and what I have achieved.

Amazing how much healing can happen when you say yes to YOU.

Whether it is food choices, walking, yoga, mindfulness or even getting down with lifting weights learning to love myself has been a journey I am so grateful for.

I have found trust in myself. And isn’t trust a much needed part of love?

This new love affair is destined to last a long, long time and I couldn’t be happier.

Heart Shaped Chocolate Cake

Imagine a beautifully crafted heart-shaped cake, rich with deep chocolate layers that are both moist and decadent. Between each layer, a luscious raspberry filling adds a bright, slightly tart contrast to the deep cocoa flavors. The cake is coated in a smooth, glossy dark chocolate ganache that cascades over the sides, creating an irresistible sheen. With a hint of orange is infused into the ganache and the cake batter, offering a subtle citrusy warmth that enhances the chocolate’s richness.

I am a huge lover of chocolate but rarely take the time and effort to bake something from scratch. This year however I have committed to being more deliberate with how I choose to spend my “free” time. These heart shaped cake are the perfect thing!

This Valentine’s Day I wanted to be deliberate and intentional in creating something luscious, chocolatety, and seductive. A practice of self love and love for others, right?

Chocolate + raspberry with a minimal hint of orange will bring just that.

It may be a tad more work than a whipping up a cake mix from a box or buying something from the bakery, but I’m feeling excited to create something so wonderful. Be sure if you do choose to add the wild orange essential oil, you choose a pure, safe and reputable brand. I only use this one.

Intentional. Deliberate. And soooooo good.

Ingredients

Cake Mix:

  • 1 1/2 cups of flour
  • 1 cup of white sugar
  • 1/3 cup of dark cocoa powder
  • 1 teaspoon of salt
  • 1/2 teaspoon of baking soda
  • 1 cup of water
  • 1/3 cup of avocado oil
  • 1 tablespoon of white vinegar
  • 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract
  • 2 drops pure wild orange essential oil

Raspberry Cream Cheese Filling:

  • 4 ounces of cream cheese softened
  • 1/2 cup of powdered sugar
  • 1/4 cup of raspberry jam
  • 1 cup of whipping cream
  • Two drops pure wild orange essential oil

Chocolate Ganache

  • 8 oz  dark or semi-sweet chocolate, finely chopped
  • 1 cup heavy cream
  • 1 tbsp unsalted butter (optional, for extra shine)
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract (optional)

Red and white sprinkles (optional)

Instructions

  1. Beat softened cream cheese and raspberry in a bowl. Add powdered sugar and whipping cream, mix on high speed until smooth. Place in the refrigerator.
  2. In a separate bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda and salt. Next, add the water, oil, vinegar, and vanilla. Beat well until mixture has no lumps.
  3. Fill up each opening halfway with batter. If you decide to make cupcakes instead, fill up liners about a 1/3 full. You can find the mold I use in my Amazon shop below.
  4. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes at 350 degrees. Once done, place mini cakes on cooling rack and allow them to completely cool. (I place them in the refrigerator to speed up the process)
  5. Carefully cut the mini cakes lengthwise and place both halves on the cooling rack with a cookie sheet underneath. (You’ll need it later to catch the excess chocolate)
  6. Add a spoonful of the raspberry filling to the flat side of one cake half and top with the second half.
  7. Melt dark or semi-sweet chocolate until smooth according to package instructions.
  8. Pour melted chocolate over mini cakes until fully covered. Smooth out with a spatula if needed. Add festive sprinkles or candies of your choice. Place in the refrigerator until chocolate sets.

Mindset

Oh my gosh, YES!

Mindset is everything!

I mean face it, the last couple of years have been hard. The word pandemic was not everyday lingo and I don’t know about you, but I never thought about the impact a virus could make on the day to day. Before this pandemic, I had a basic understanding of political differences but the depth at which the country has gone the last few years is startling. The division is palpable in our cities and even in our homes.

Along with the collective challenges that we have all endured we each have our own unique challenges layered upon the big challenges. How we face them determines the quality of our lives. This isn’t to say that putting on a smiling face everyday will be the answer, but our ability to shift our mindset and not hold onto the things we have no control over can certainly help our happiness factor.

Mindset matters

Truth is for me personally, I am a self-employed yoga teacher who has had to navigate how to continue to earn an income during these hard times; going from full-time teaching in long term care facilities, my own studio and a large health club to virtual only was a huge hit financially and had a big impact on my ability to feel fulfilled teaching. It is doable, but hard to connect through a screen, especially with individuals with special needs. I am also a full time caregiver for my special needs daughter; so her programming went all virtual which meant not only was I her primary caregiver, I also became her primary friend/peer/teacher/support/transportation/provider, which was hard on both of us. My last major daily hurdle is I have three health conditions that cause me to experience tremendous pain and fatigue. Managing my pain and being able to show up for my students and my family takes grit some days.

Most of the time, my MINDSET allows me to handle it (somewhat) gracefully and I choose to make the best of this precious life. I have a few must-do practices to keep my mindset in the right place:

I am committed to my health and fitness.

I begin and end my day with a walk. I also walk on my lunch hour and anytime during the day I have sat too much or the burdens of life feels heavy. Some days I get over 25,000 steps and that is okay. It works for me. I find walking manages my pain better than anything else. I also practice yoga and do strength training 3-4 times per week.

I am committed to constantly changing my business model for the changing times and am open to always working hard.

I have learned to be flexible (haha, no yoga teacher joke intended). I navigate the demands of the audience and am constantly learning how to best utilize my skills in a virtual world. I also invite small groups into my studio and while the income may not be what a large group is, I feel connected and inspired and that fulfills me. I work nearly 7 days a week either teaching, marketing, following up, promoting, etc. I am committed to this gift.

I am committed to seeing the best in every situations.

Some people have told me that my rosy lenses aren’t accurate for the world, but I love them. I choose to look at both sides of the situation and try to find the small nuggets of wisdom that may be there to learn. I avoid situations that are filled with hatred, division, anger and judgment which means my circle of friends is small, I spend a lot of time by myself and I avoid the news.

I am committed to saying YES!

I have found that when we live in a state of pessimism (I spent decades there), we attract the very things we dislike. When we learn to say yes to the best possible outcomes, we attract that. If you don’t believe me, try it for a month. Say yes to new opportunities, to new experiences, to new friends, to abundance and then sit back and enjoy the ride.

I am committed to a daily Gratitude practice.

It is so easy to get sucked into the unfortunately popular culture that much of the world sees as not enough (time, money, resources, love). When we shift our attention to what we actually have plenty of, we get more (time, money, resources, love). Look around and notice the abundance of color, texture, living things, and feelings. There really is plenty to be thankful for.

It is a choice and although some days it can be harder to stay in a positive mindset given the status of the world, it is possible with a little changes to our thoughts. My mindset has served me incredibly well.

That’s my mindset, what is yours?

Deliberate (Word 2022)

deliberate adjective; Done consciously and intentionally. Fully considered; not impulsive. Done or acting in a careful and unhurried way.

For many years I have chosen a word for my year. I often say that to me this is like a thread that gets woven into the tapestry of our lives. Some years the thread may be glittery and bright, and other years the thread may be a little heavier and denser in its unique makeup. Either way as I look at the tapestry of my life, I can see easily the threads that have been woven together to create something beautiful. I love to look at my bookshelf in my office and see eighteen years worth of journals and planners that have become the themes throughout much if my adult life.

My word for 2022 is DELIBERATE. 

I love words and I love to look at definitions. The definition that sticks with me the most is done consciously and intentionally. If you know me at all, you might see a very determined woman who rarely says no. I don’t think this is because I am a huge people pleaser, although maybe my gut is telling me that at some point I need to check in with that. I think I say yes to everything because I like to be the person who isn’t always “too busy, too tired, too overwhelmed, too stressed, too much in pain, too whatever”. I refuse (probably in an unhealthy way) to allow life’s challenges to dictate what I do. However, I am realizing that saying yes too quickly often leads me to feel frustrated and overwhelmed because in my heart I would rather be doing something else.

I also chose this word because I have a desire to shift my quick decision making and tendency for my abrupt communication style to one that exhibits a more thoughtful approach. I have a quick thinking mind and sometimes I can blurt out something without thinking through how it will be heard. I am tenacious in all of my efforts and learning to be more deliberate and temper my fast moving mind may be of benefit for more. I also have a tendency to say yes to everything and everyone, leaving myself at the bottom of the list. I want to be mindful of how I spend my time and say yes to things that really feed me, rather than commit to something for the sake of simply saying yes. I want to do better about filling up the margins of my own life, rather than with feeling overwhelmed come across as a need to have an impulse to create boundaries around things. To me the recent popularity of having boundaries feels like a fence that keeps things and people away, whereas margins are up to the person deciding for their own life how to fill that space. So I get to choose what goes within the margins of my life and I am going to choose goodness and things that feel right in my heart. Through conscious and intentional living, I intend to be more deliberate with my choices. I am laser sharp when it comes to my business and my personal health, but there is definitely space to grow in my choices and become more intentional with other areas of my life.

The practical ways that I plan to implement and welcome in the concept of being more deliberate includes blocking every Friday off as a day where I will choose how I fill it. I have gone through my planner and highlighted a block around every Friday for the year. That is at least 52 chances for me to pause, to check in and then decide how I fill my day. Another practical way that I am moving towards being more deliberate is I am wearing an amazonite mala necklace and a bracelet as a reminder. Amazonite is a stone of peace, truth, harmony, and communication. It’s been called the “peacemaker stone” due to its communicative abilities and will be a gentle reminder for me to communicate clearly, calmly and with intention. Amazonite also empowers and strengthens any intention that may be set in it, so this morning I held it closely and told it what it is here to remind me of. Finally, amazonite reminds us that we are in control of our own destiny and our decisions will affect our outcome.

The non-practical ways that I plan to use this thread in my life is I am going to make the space to be very open by feeling less impulsive and becoming more unhurried and slower in my life. I am planning to let go of the concept of hard-driven goals and instead have a sweet little map that will guide me to unknown outcomes. This in a very round-a-bout way feels more intentional to me. Slowing down, considering the course I want my year to lead me, and being conscious and awake in my decisions.

So often when we choose a word we can be inviting in some big challenges and hurdles and I am preparing myself that those will come. When they do, I may want to slip back into the old and very familiar ways of living. I hope that because I am speaking my word to anyone willing to listen when they see that old impulsive, always-saying-yes person, they will take a gentle hand and guide me back to being in alignment with my intention to become more deliberate.

Are you ready for 2022? Join me in a life of intention and awareness! What is your word?

A Look Back at Refinement 2021

When I began this year, I was welcoming in the idea of taking everything that is good in and around me and polishing it off to become great. As I looked at what that would look like in my thoughts, words and actions I decided that the word that would capture this best for 2021 would be refinement. If you have hung around me for any amount of time you know that choosing a word or intention for your year is an absolute must. To me it creates a map or a guide as to how I will navigate the terrain that I will encounter throughout the 365 days of being human.

I set out to start making soft and subtle adjustments to my mindset and how I show up in the world, and the result has been incredible.

For the last eight or nine years I have been pushing so hard in my business(es) and in my own personal life, and my words of the year have been a definite reflection of that push up until 2021. The last several years my words have been ones like bold, reverence, flourish, and limitless. I have spent that last few years rallying around bettering my business and my personal growth. I feel like I have been in a constant push for several years which takes a ton of energy. Prior to that some of my words were essence, discover, and peace and each of those years brought some fantastic and grueling challenges to be within alignment with those intentions. This year though I began the process of softening a bit and living with a bit less intensity and refining aspects of my life. Realizing toward the end of 2020, I was exhausted I decided stop spinning and instead sit with what is already amazing and make it better.

Here is how I did:

  • I took a chance early this year that I could find work in the big city of Denver serving adults with brain injuries and four agencies said YES. The work has been so fulfilling and validates me in many ways. I have been an adaptive yoga teacher for many, many years but have stayed “safe” within my own little city and venturing out was a definite refining all that is good, and make it better decision.

  • I let go of teaching classes that drain, exhaust, or don’t align with my soul, and instead dove into more of what DOES feed and nourish me.

  • I discovered several close people in my life who I thought I knew really well and I felt had my best interest in mind, were very different than I thought. I chose to distance myself from that kind of energy because it was only hurting me. The freedom that has come from cleaning house as far as who I surround myself with has been liberating.

  • I let go of my attachments to outcomes related to finances and instead decided that as I spend money, I receive money. I opened the flow of reciprocity and the results have been beautiful.

  • I found my healthy weight about eighteen years ago as I let go of about eighty pounds and I have felt pretty strong despite my orthopedic challenges, BUT I took on a strength training program that has transformed me from being a very fit person to an incredibly strong and toned person. Besides the physical difference, I am empowered and confident in my body which is something of recent years I have not felt often.

  • I was able to fulfill of dream of refining my living space by renovating my house on a somewhat large scale and pay cash for most of it.

  • I realized this fall that being in alignment with my values or principles is the number one way for me to stay in the flow of goodness in all areas of my life. Step outside of those, and I become lost quite quickly. I review those vales often, especially before I make a major decision.

  • Mostly this year I spent cleaning up the parts of my life that were cluttered, unfulfilling, distracting, and at times destructive. Instead, I was busy making a simplified and glorious version of myself shine in the world.

As I gratefully spend the next day or so of 2021, I am soaking in the processes I have discovered and am preparing to close this chapter. Look for something amazing for 2022 for myself and the world.

A Gratitude Practice

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melodie Beattie

This is a special time of year when we find ourselves being more thankful and appreciative. I love to see the focus of many people shift from the outward struggles that the collective world is feeling to a focus on abundance. If only we could all stay focused on the good in our lives rather than the nonsense that floods and feeds the division in our world.

Gratitude Practice

I believe that a deliberate practice of gratitude can truly change your life. Many years ago I began a daily gratitude journal and after a short time I realized that throughout my day I was looking for things to be able to write down in my journal. What a life-changer to be on the look-out for what is good versus what is lack. Now after 18 years of a daily gratitude practice, if I find that in times of fear or sadness, I can open up any of one of those journals and be reminded of all that I really do have in my life.

I encourage you to spend some time each day acknowledging a few things in your life that you can be grateful for, including yourself! If you are not sure what to be grateful for beyond the obvious, then I say use your senses! What did you smell today? Did you feel something amazing today? Describe something that you tasted today that was amazing? To deepen your practice, you can include why you are grateful. I love to acknowledge that I am grateful for my friends because they help me to feel connected.

How to have a gratitude practice

When we think of abundance we often think of the tangible, material, often obvious things in our life to be grateful for; house, food, car, employment, etc. I would like to offer up acknowledging the abundance of less visible things; the love you feel for someone, the colors that surround your life, the sounds of music and laughter, the aroma that fills your home from a hearty soup, or the growth that you have shown this year.

Soak in all that is untouchable. Fill your heart with the fullness of simply being alive and experiencing the sensations each day offers.