Prior to having my daughter, my only experience with autism was watching Rainman my senior year of high school. Little did I know that in just five years, I would be living within the world of autism. In a short time, I would know more about autism than I ever thought possible.
Autism became my world.
To celebrate my daughter’s 30th birthday and the path of autism that we have navigated together I came up with thirty things that she has taught me in her thirty years.
What autism has taught me.
- It is okay to be disappointed, angry and incredibly sad.
- You will be excluded from some people, but you will also find your own tribe.
- Unconditional love really does exist.
- Not everyone will get it, and that is okay.
- It is not your job to make people get it, it is your job to model how to, and then walk away.
- Milestones are incredibly hard.
- Parenting a child with autism is very lonely.
- Most marriages and relationships with be deeply affected.
- Your role as an advocate never ends.
- The spectrum of autism is truly just that–not one is the same so don’t compare.
- It is hard.
- It is okay to grieve…a lot, and in the most unexpected times.
- Siblings need extra attention because they also grieve the sibling they didn’t get.
- You will learn more from them than you might ever expect.
- The quirkiest of quirks will be part of your everyday life.
- Plan on worrying about things that other parents might never even think of.
- It is likely you will feel at times that you are a full time taxi driver even longer than a typical parent.
- Therapies become your weekly outings and social time.
- You will be scared about the future.
- Schedules will run your life, if you let them. I opted to not and teach flexibility instead.
- Meltdowns are hard. Don’t take them personal and let people stare, they have no idea what it’s like.
- Your special child will become your GREATEST teacher, if you are willing to be the student.
- Literal thinking will make you laugh and cry at the same.
- Be ready to explain in various ways instructions. Written seems to be the best around here.
- A cell phone became the emotional connection that was needed to share feelings.
- Birthdays are hard.
- You might never hear the words “I love you”….trust that your person does, though.
- You will be a lifeline and it can be exhausting.
- Allow the quirks to lead your heart to a place it may have otherwise never known.
- Trust yourself. You know what it is best.
Very powerful. Thank you for writing it.
Thanks for reading ?